Scott Croft is an elder at Capitol Hill Baptist Church where he teaches a seminar on friendship, courtship and marriage.He is also an attorney who is used to tackling tough questions.
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* * * If you're reading this, you're interested in dating. In our society, dating has become something of an obsession. It's just something you do if you're single and of age (and that age is quickly dropping) in America. In fact, depending on which statistics one believes, the divorce rate for professing Christians may actually be than for Americans as a whole.
You've done it, you're doing it, you'd like to do it, or you need to teach somebody else how to do it. It is considered the natural precursor to marriage, and is generally considered something to be desired, whatever form it might take. If you were to Google the word "matchmaker," you would receive something in the neighborhood of 21,200,000 responses — with a few of these outfits claiming to be Christian, but most making no such claim. As evangelical Christians, we're called to be distinct in the ways we think and act about all issues that confront us and those around us. Granted, not all of these people are evangelicals, but we're not doing so well either.
" or "What do you do when you live hundreds of miles from your family?
"The goal of this series of articles, beginning with this introduction, is to provide our readers with a place to bring those questions.
Joshua Harris, for instance, has promoted a model of courtship that harkens back to a model used broadly before modern dating evolved.
People attempting to follow a courtship model within today's culture, however, often run into a lot of practical questions, such as, "What if her dad is unavailable or uninterested in being involved?
This is what one blogger said concerning courtship: “To me, courting became an ideal in the same way that socialism is an ideal — and while I flirted briefly with socialism as a 13 year old (reading some of Marx’s own writings), it didn’t take me long to see that what sounded great in theory and on paper resulted in disaster and catastrophe when implemented in real life.
Through observing the experiences of others, reading exhaustively, and studying Scripture, I have come to the same conclusion about “courting” as a philosophy” — it works much better on paper than it does in practice.” How does it work out in practice?
If you were to ask me several years ago to give you a rundown of courtship vs dating I would have easily pulled out my notes and let it rip.
But the more I read online, the more I’ve seen that (at least in Christian circles) courtship and dating mean different things to different people.
The system today's young men and women have inherited for finding and marrying a future spouse leaves a lot to be desired.